Age-old Question: What Is My Purpose in Life?
Now that we’ve learned more about the relationship between resilience and having a purpose in life, I’d like to talk about how to “find” that purpose. I turn to Tony Robbins, a global entrepreneur, best-selling author and life strategist.
What is My Purpose in Life?
In his article, “What is My Purpose? Unlock the Answers to the Age-Old Question of How to Find Purpose in Life,” Robbins says that many people have no idea how to find their purpose in life. Having goals, he explains, creates a sense of achievement and is essential for living the life one desires. He believes that purpose takes those personal goals to a higher level.
Robbins writes, “Progress equals happiness. Achieving goals does not equal happiness.” He describes progress as “a true sense of fulfillment. And fulfillment isn’t a luxury or leisure activity – it’s a necessity.” He believes that the two major factors that hinder the discovery of one’s purpose are the need for stability and predictability, and limiting beliefs, both of which prevent growth.
I particularly love this quote from Robbins: “Achieving goals may not help you find the purpose of life, but knowing your purpose can help you achieve your goals. When you truly know your purpose, you’ll experience a sense of clarity like never before as you’re able to connect what you want to achieve to your ultimate fulfillment. You’ll feel passionate, driven and laser-focused. You’ll stop battling with the past and the future and start living in the present – and that’s the greatest gift you can give yourself.”
https://www.tonyrobbins.com/stories/date-with-destiny/what-is-my-purpose/
How to Find Purpose in Life
Robbins says that in order to be successful in finding your purpose, you have to balance “the science of achievement and the art of fulfillment.” Here are his top 12 recommendations:
1. Search Inward
Instead of seeking approval and prioritizing other people’s opinions, look inside yourself, and you will find everything you need. Replace your limiting beliefs with empowering ones in order to develop greater awareness.
2. Put Purpose Before Goals
Instead of focusing on short-term goals, keep in mind that the goals you work toward should be based on finding your purpose. For each goal you set for yourself, ask how it will make you feel more fulfilled.
3. Focus on What You Have
Robbins calls this an “abundance mindset,” which will open your eyes to life. If you focus on what you have, abundance will replace fear.
4. Take Ownership of Your Life
Fulfillment results from designing your own life and not being driven by fear or anxiety. That means understanding that every circumstance in your life is a result of your own decisions. When you take responsibility for finding your purpose, fulfillment will follow.
5. Think About What Brings You Joy
Robbins writes, “When you discover what brings you joy, you usually discover where your passions lie…Your abilities are connected to that sense of joy, so examine them, too.”
6. Develop Your Own Life Vision Statement
Create a life vision of your “ideal” world and how you fit into it. It means identifying what life would look like if everyone were living up to their fullest potential.
7. Discover Your True Needs
It’s important to know your needs, because this knowledge will affect every decision you make. If you don’t even know where to begin identifying your needs, Robbins offers the “Six Human Needs:”
Certainty
Significance
Variety
Love/Connection
Growth
Contribution
8. Write Out Your Story
You can organize your thoughts by writing them down. Ask yourself these questions:
What strengths do you have that helped you get through tough times?
How have you helped others?
How have other people helped you?
9. Take Time for Yourself
You need some quiet time to reflect on your answer to the question, “What is my purpose?” You might begin with some self-care such, as a gratitude meditation, a spa day, or a walk in the park to help you relax yourself into the right frame of mind.
10. Embrace Acceptance
Robbins defines this as self-compassion. Be patient with yourself, getting to know yourself better. This will help you build self-awareness.
11. Find Your Community
Ask yourself where you fit in and where you feel at home. You could answer this by taking a class, volunteering or finding others who enjoy the same activities as you, whether it’s music, art, yoga or dog-walking.
12. Be Flexible
If something no longer fits, get rid of it! This means letting go of old identities and interests that no longer serve you. According to Robbins, “Your purpose in life is also likely to grow and change as you grow and change. You must be willing to be flexible and to listen to your innermost wants and needs…Finding your purpose is a lifelong journey. Being flexible lets you grow in integrity while being true to yourself. When you develop your core values and stop seeking external affirmation, you’ll find that the question of ‘What is my purpose in life?’ is much easier to answer.”
More Tips From Line Hilton and BetterUp
I’d like to add a few more tips about finding your purpose from Line Hilton’s and BetterUp’s articles, both of which I referred to in my previous blog.
Tips from Line Hilton
Set short, medium and long-term goals
Don’t obsess about what you can’t control
“What went well?” Spend ten minutes focusing on three good things that happened in your day
Visualize by picturing what you want to change and achieve
Practice gratitude
Create a vision board with images and quotes from things that inspire you
https://linehilton.com/how-finding-purpose-helps-build-your-resilience/
Tips from BetterUp
Develop a growth mindset
Create a personal vision statement
Give back
Turn your pain into purpose
Spend time with people who inspire you
Read
Join a cause